Ready?

In a lot of ways, I'm glad I have been too busy to thoroughly contemplate that question. The hours keep slipping through my fingers. Even though I haven't been sleeping quite as much, my days feel to short.

I miss home. I have been looking forward to this time of year since I left. It's Wednesday night; I leave Friday morning. Suddenly, the time is not enough, and I can't do anything about it. So I just have to give my kids as many little hugs as I can when I see them tomorrow. I have to bake with Kady and try not to worry about what I'll do without her. I have to laugh with Miss Myla. I have say a lot of 'thank you's' and a lot of 'I'll miss you's'. I have to enjoy and appreicate all of the things that make life beautiful or unique here in Honduras. I want to soak every last detail in before it's time to say that one word I'm no good at.

Goodbye.

So I'm Vegan for Good?

It's kind of funny. Since coming to Honduras, I have eaten more meat than I have in my whole life. That being said, I've probably only had meat about once a month or so. I usually only eat meat when others are serving it to me, and I don't want to be rude. It's this philosophy I have, but anyway that's not what I am writing to explain. I'm explaining why I'm probably going to have to be vegan forever now. Thanks, Kadian. haha. Other than a very occasional exception, I am entirely vegan. But like I mentioned, those exceptions come around every now and then usually without any noticeable harm. Today I was not so fortunate.

I went to Pizza Hut with the first graders for an end of the year party. During our two and a half hour trip, I had to deal with bleeding children twice, tears once (and no, it wasn't one of the bleeding children), and I felt many of the protective screams in my mind that must plague many concerned mothers. Bare feet in an indoor jungle gym? Oh think of all the germs and bacteria...! That child has a sucker in their mouth, she should not be playing like that! Those boys are being too rough. NO climbing the slide! Don't they see that sign? It says PELIGRO (danger). Oh, and the kitchen caught on fire somehow. Just your average day out, I suppose. Anyway, after eating I felt absolutely miserable. I ate a few things that didn't help: Ranch on my salad, a hard boiled egg, two pieces of cheese pizza. Yuck. I think this vegan thing might be stuck. I felt nauseas, my head hurt, general weakness and exhaustion. 

I've always thought being vegan is probably best what with all the weird hormones animals are fed, and dairy products not really being so great for your digestive system. But I never thought I could do it. This year has shown me otherwise. However, I kind of wondered if it would stick or not when I got home. This experience has me thinking it will.

June, is that really You?

Well, my blogging has most definitely taken a nose dive since my computer charger went, but thankfully I have been journaling  pretty often to help keep track of the memories. I cannot believe June is here! I knew time had to keep moving and that after yesterday June would inevitably be upon us. But still. I´m having trouble wrapping my mind around it. June means brings so many realities...

For one, when I at last was able to talk with Steven yesterday (after talking to him for the first time in almost five months), goodbye did not feel so daunting. There is no longer a long amount of separation looming in the distance. In fact, we only have two more Sabbaths apart! My heart is full and overflowing with joy. This morning my reading through the Bible (which isn´t moving quite as quickly as planned, but I am making steady progress!) brought me towards the end of Proverbs. I once again read a verse that brought be hope way back in November. Proverbs 25:25 tells us, Like cold water to a weary soul, is good news from a distant land. How true indeed.

June also means the end of school. I still remember my first day. I didn´t know school was actually starting. It was just a meet the students kind of day, but I did not know they were going to be there until right before we left the house in the morning. I remember trying to talk to a classroom of kindergartners, and wondering how on earth I was going to teach them when they did not understand a word out of my mouth or sing with me. Now here we are. I feel success, contentment, and a undeniable tinge of sadness.

June means going home. June means change. June means a lot of goodbyes, and also a lot of hello´s. June means my heart is going to break,  yet finally be complete. June means leaving all that has become so familiar to return to what is supposed to feel normal. June will bring birthdays, weddings, parties, reunions. June will bring sad tears, and happy ones too. Oh June. I have been waiting for this month for so long, but I never thought it would come. Now that it´s here, I´m not sure what to say. Do I want it to hurry by? No. Although part of me cannot wait to be in that airport, I´m not quite ready yet. Part of me wonders if I´ll be ready when the time comes. But for right now, with school ending and Steven back in the modern world of communication and God as my guide, my heart cannot be anything but completely and utterly content.